Why I Broke My Promise About Never Again Taking An Agency Job
After 40 years of helping make PR agency owners rich, I decided to turn in my employee ID card and open my own consultancy, specializing in all things media, from developing storylines for programs to restructuring failed media plans to advising government officials abroad. Over the years, I’ve also had the opportunity to work with leaders at the highest levels of government, including U.S. presidents such as Donald Trump and Joe Biden, and to be selective about the clients I chose to represent.
Prior to starting my own business, I had built a strong reputation in what I called “creative publicity” during my time at Burson-Marsteller, then widely considered one of the largest and most respected international PR agencies. I promised myself I would never again accept a job at a PR agency, no matter how lucrative the offer, although working from a home office, my wife frequently encouraged me to reconsider.
But a year ago, I received an offer that gave me pause. It came from a start-up agency offering a high six-figure salary and stock options that could grow significantly if the company succeeded. Given the founder’s track record, I decided, encouraged in part by my wife, to consider returning to agency life. The founder assured me I could continue working with my own clients, as long as I also supported agency business. That meant long hours at the office, which my wife didn’t mind, especially if I was still available to help with the New York Times puzzles, though she rarely needed it.
What ultimately intrigued me wasn’t the compensation. It was the founder’s promise that this agency would operate differently. He claimed it would prioritize employees over profits, something I was skeptical of, given my experience.
Still, I agreed to meet him.
At lunch in the agency dining room, we were joined by 25 team members, apparently a regular occurrence, with employees invited to dine with leadership on a rotating basis.
After dessert, he showed me what he called a PR Employees Bill of Rights. Employees were expected to follow it, with clear consequences for violations.
The Bill of Rights included:
Any employee who harasses another would be immediately dismissed.
Promotions would be based on skills, not office politics.
Taking credit for others’ ideas would result in dismissal.
Promotions would not be tied solely to account profitability, but to quality of work.
Reports prepared for senior management would be reviewed by team members to ensure proper credit.
Employees working more than 40 hours per week would receive overtime pay.
Supervisors would not contact employees after 7 p.m., on weekends, or during vacations.
New hires would be eligible for the agency’s 401(k) plan after 31 days.
Personal errands for senior staff would not be permitted.
HR would focus on creating a positive and supportive workplace environment.
The founder had even appointed someone to ensure these principles were upheld.
Before accepting the offer, I spoke with several employees. They all said the policies were real and that the culture was unlike any agency they had experienced. They described an environment where people were treated with respect, not as numbers.
So I accepted the job.
And for a time, it was the most positive agency experience I’d ever had.
Here’s why. Unlike my previous experiences:
People genuinely liked working together.
Credit was shared appropriately.
Promotions were celebrated, not resented.
Office politics didn’t drive advancement.
Managers supported, rather than intimidated, their teams.
Performance evaluations were constructive, not punitive.
The agency protected staff from unreasonable client behavior and would walk away if necessary.
It felt like a dream.
Because it was.
It was April Fools’ Day.
The reality of agency life returned the moment I stepped off the elevator, greeted the receptionist with a “Good morning,” and heard the reply, “Who says?”
So while this may be my annual April Fools’ column, it reflects more truth about agency life than many might care to admit.
(This piece is a work of satire. Any resemblance to real organizations or experiences is coincidental and does not reflect the views of this publication.)
